Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving," a student wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey."
Why did the police arrest the turkey? They suspected it of fowl play.
Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers? To keep his wigwam.
A guy was picking through the frozen turkeys at the supermarket, but couldn't find one as big as his girlfriend wanted... so he found the manager and asked, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?". The manager answered, "Sorry, they're all dead.
"Why should you keep your eye off the turkey dressing? Because it makes her blush ...
What do you call sad cranberries? Blueberries
What kind of music did the Pilgrims play for the Indians on Thanksgiving? Plymouth Rock
Things That Sound Dirty On Thanksgiving
Whew, that's one terrific spread!
I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
Talk about a huge breast!
It's Cool Whip time!
If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
Are you ready for seconds yet?
Are you going to come again next time?
It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?
Just wait your turn, you'll get some!
Don't play with your meat.
Just spread the legs open & stuff it in.
Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
I didn't expect everyone to come at once!
You still have a little bit on your chin.
Use a nice smooth stroke when you whip it.
How long will it take after you stick it in?
You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!
How many are coming?
That's the biggest one I've ever seen!
Just lay back & take it easy...I'll do the rest.
How long do I beat it before it's ready?