Or as I call them "Da Uncles"
I love calling cops "the fuzz . So I was totally surrounded by cops growing up...Now don't you get the wrong idea naughty boys! I really was a good boy.....I will go out on a limb and say a VERY GOOD boy! My step daddy was with the Honolulu Police Dept and then when we moved here he was with the Seattle Police Department for many years. He is now in heaven and its hard to believe he has been gone for a few years. Culturally in Hawaii and for most locals from Hawaii your elders are looked up too and guys are typically called "Uncle" and all women are all called "Aunty".....So growing up I had a lot of cops I called my "uncles". I talked about one of my first "experiences" which was with a "uncle" when I was 15 in a previous post. So we can say I have a thing for the fuzz!
Weekend is here and I am happy work week is over for the week. We are going out tonight...Will be meeting up with friends to listen to some Hawaiian "Jams" (music) and eat some "ono" ( yummy) Hawaiian food! Not much else planned for my weekend. I need to spend time some quality time with my mom as she is not doing good and we had more bad news this week from her doctors. I am actually hoping to maybe take some time off in the next week or so and just stay with her and hang out so we can just enjoy each others company. I see her every weekend and I enjoy our times we have.
I really haven't talked about my moms illness much in my blog....I guess I am not ready to do that yet...let alone talk at all about it much verbally or to many it seems......its all just too much to even start on and to grasp in my head. my mind and to even put into words you know? The whole situation with my mom just sucks so bad. We just don't know how much longer she will be with us here......I wish I could say its for another year "I have hope" but I know times going very fast these days and I know and feel in my heart that we don't have much longer as she is getting tired and its hard to see her battle so much. I can see it in her eyes lately. She is tired and scared. I am scared as well. I try to not think about it 24/7 but is hard not too. I think I have been throwing myself into work and other things as its keeps my mind off of it a bit which is good and bad. Its at night when I go to bed that enters into my head and I toss and turn over it all..... So life right now is kinda in a tailspin a bit..... Don't worry Rad is fine... its just fragile times for me right now.
The hardest or maybe most annoying part is the shit I have to hear from people...how I need to be strong and I need to be positive and I have to not let the stress get to me. The whole make lemonade out of lemon mentality--you know that motivational type of hog shit....Though I appreciate it as I know its the thought that counts I really much rather scream oh fuck you! I have has a few of these " stay positive comments" in the last few months and it really rattled my cage. I just want my true family and friends to just say " Hey Bud I love you and I am here for you man and your family......That's all.....easy breezy....forget all the BS....And the ones that just keep it simple are my true rocks.... The rest can take a flying well you know......I don't have time for the preach types.....So I have been making sure to not let any stress get to me. I will be strong when needed and even weak when I may crumble....But I am human and I will be ok.
Heck.... I had 25 plus cops as my uncles! And lots of friends and OHANA to shape the Rad Homo I am today....So I know I will good. I think I have a pretty good idea on where, what and who really matters in my life with what has happened in the last year.....